why, that's mike jensen

I'm done reading TheDirty. It's well-done gossip, but it hurts.

I browsed their 'Seattle' section, and, uh, found this picture of former UW Husky Mike Jensen, who is best remembered as a Detlef Schrempf Memorial Tall White Guy with Range, and the goat of an absolutely brutal loss to UConn in 2006

Here's Mike now:


Sigh. I think sites like TheDirty make it that much more  likely that athletes will not be looked upon as role models in future generations. Probably a good thing. Of course, not too many people are looking up to Mike nowadays. According to Seattlest, Jensen signed with a Chinese Basketball Association team back in '06:

For years China has been sending us cheap, crappy products, and now the US of A is about to return the favor.

Oof. Mike, I don't mind that you get your NW guido on in the club, and I'm over that awful foul. But just know that the internet exists. Just know. It's always fascinating to me how people who are apparently obsessed with image don't think of how they come off:

here is one Seattle’s finest d-bags, his name is mike. he used to play hoops at the university of Washington. he is a 30k millionaire and still hangs out at college bars at uw with all the 19 year girls that sneak in. he graduated like 3 years but is always hitting on young girls telling them he use to be a b-ball player and is famous. i don’t know if I’ve ever seen anyone throw up more hand signs for pictures then this guy.

That's from TheDirty's tip-off e-mail.


Yes, Mike, TheDirty's tip-off e-mail. I dunno if Mike Jensen's a bad dude or not, but my last 15 minutes of Googling serve as a pretty interesting cautionary tale: even if you're a Pac-10 rotation player, the camera will find you. And then find you later. And as someone who freely posted some drag pictures to facebook, let me just say that the currently en vogue gang-sign poses make pretty much everyone look retarded. Cal Ripken could throw one of these up, and I'd be like, "Whoa...might Cal be a douchebag?" Just grin and throw an arm, y'all. Mike and Brady Quinn ain't the only ones. In a decade, parents will be begging their kids not to play sports.



[TheDirty.com: Tourette Syndrome Wanna Be Mafia Douche] 

[Seattlest: Former Husky About To Drive One Billion People Crazy] 

And here's that atrocious, not-hard-enough foul on Marcus Williams (4:25-ish):

Okay, now I'm beginning to think he's a bad guy.